Tha Werd

Caught Staring

2010-04-01T22:34:00.000-07:00

I was looking at you. You weren’t looking at me.

I reveled in your glow most discreetly.

I looked you up and down and then down and up.

I drank you in slowly and you filled my cup.

Then you saw me. Your look said it all.

I looked away. But my bluff you did call.

You caught a glimpse of me glimpsing you.

I was caught staring. What else could I do?

I thought I was safe from behind the shades.

Hiding in obscurity. I had it made.

No way you could tell I was checking you out.

Head to toe I wondered what you were about.

But just as I made my way to your eyes,

You shot me a glance that showed your despise.

You caught a glimpse of me glimpsing you,

I was caught staring. What else could I do?

I looked away and then back but your eyes were still there.

Burning a hole right through me with your angry glare.

My cover was blown, yet I couldn’t stop,

Took another look back to savor one last drop.

Your eyes hadn’t moved. You knew I was coming.

Now I’m dead in my tracks. Gut checked and numbing.

You caught a glimpse of me glimpsing you.

I was caught staring. What else could I do?

I moseyed along. My daydream was through.

I was caught staring. What else could I do?

Top Ten Rules to Live By for Rap Battles

2009-04-25T21:11:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to share this twitspiration...

Rule #10 of rap battles: No props! This ain't Carrot Top. (Ahem, @davidblevy bustin' out the phone with the line "Tell 'em all on Twitter") about 3 hours ago from TwitterBerry

Rule #9 of rap battles: If you're not ready with a rhyme, say "Yo, yo, yo, check it out" over and over 'til you got one! about 3 hours ago from TwitterBerry

Rule #8 of rap battles: Act like you've been there before! (Also applies to playoff games.) about 3 hours ago from TwitterBerry

Rule #7 of rap battles: Don't repeat a rhyme you used earlier. (Guilty as charged from @snuggiepubcrawl) about 3 hours ago from TwitterBerry

Rule #6 of rap battles: If you mess up, keep flowin'! (If the crowd is as wasted as you, they won't know the difference!) about 3 hours ago from TwitterBerry

Rule #5 of rap battles (wife's in the bathroom): Don't wear a slanket! (Ya heard, @davidblevy!?!) about 3 hours ago from TwitterBerry

Rule #4 of rap battles (per Lisa Goldman): Keep your rap battle rules separate from date night. (Busted) about 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry

Rule #3 of rap battles: It's not always what you say, it's how you say it (ie, play to the crowd) about 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry

Rule #2 of rap battles: make fun of yourself first to take the ammo away from your opponent. about 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry

Top 10 rules for rap battles. #1: always have a fall-back, go-to line. Mine is hit 'em with the baseball bat, I'm not the dog, I'm the cat. about 4 hours ago from TwitterBerry

Snuggie vs. Slanket

2009-03-26T20:56:00.000-07:00

Who'd have ever thought that a blanket with sleeves,
Could start such a battle -- sure is hard to believe!

First came the Slanket, but it was expensive and buggy,
Leaving room for a new entrant, the low-priced Snuggie.

But wait, there's more, cuz if you order your Snuggie now,
They'll throw in a booklight, sure beats the Shamwow!

So who will emerge as the long term playa?
Slanket or Snuggie -- who's got the most flair?

Only time will tell but we'll soon get a preview,
On April 18th, with the battle of 2 live Jews.

At the end of the Snuggie Pub Crawl in the heart of Chi-town,
It's the Slanket vs. Snuggie rap battle and only 1 crown!

Update: Snuggie Won! Ya heard. Das my werd. Video forthcoming.

Partly Cloudy

2008-01-27T11:27:00.000-08:00

Partly sunny, partly shade...
As the cold wind blows, my memories fade.

What once was clear and crisp as a fall breeze,
Is now muddied at the bottom of a pile of leaves.

Rake and claw to the recesses of your mind,
Open the window to your heart and find...

Buried beneath the darkness and despair,
Lies the core of a soul no worse for the wear.

So the next time you find yourself falling to your knees,
Get back up, exhale and see the forest for the trees.

-Willard G. Scott

There's No Time Like the Present...

2008-01-27T11:04:00.000-08:00

And there's no greater present than time.

Time may heal all wounds,
But it won't keep you in your prime.

What I wouldn't do for an extra hour a day,
I'd do just about anything, that is, but time.

Even a stopped clock's right twice a day,
So why must the punishment fit the crime?

There's a time for every season,
But in winter you can't grow thyme.

So let's all live in the moment,
And cherish the light that's lime.

-Life is a G-I-F-T

The Game Changer

2007-10-20T16:51:00.000-07:00

Like a shot to the heart but not too late,
Our love has spawned a creature of fate.

Will our destiny remain unbound,
As our feet become rooted to the ground?

Will we finally give in to the call of the West?
Or will we still keep things close to the vest?

Lots of questions, less and less time.
Will I be able to squeeze in the ocassional rhyme?

One things for certain, nothing will be the same.
But that's what I signed up for when I changed the game.

-Papa-G

Tha Line is Fine...

2007-09-13T20:46:00.000-07:00

There's a fine line between self-discipline and OCD,
Is that why they call it borderline?

There's a fine line between mothering and smothering,
But how else will they keep you in line?

There's a fine line between confident and cocky,
Some just know how to toe the line.

There's a fine line between love and hate,
Especially when the woman is fine.

-----------------------G--------------------------

Can't Buy Me Love...

2007-08-18T15:23:00.000-07:00

Unless you got deep pockets.

Can't stop the shining...
Unless you got red rockets.

We shall overcome...
Unless we're underwhelmed.

And we shall live in peace...
Unless Bush is at the helm.

The blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice...
Unless the berry is buried and the rim is loose.

One of these things is not like the other...
Unless he's just your brother from another mother.

Same bat time, same bat channel...
Same bad tie, same bad flannel.

Can't touch this... unless you can.
Can't fade me... unless you're tan.
Can't hold me down... unless you're strong.
Can't play me... unless this is your song.

-G... unless it's F.

Chocolate Rain

2007-08-04T21:11:00.000-07:00

Pourin' down like thunder,
From a land way down under.

'Neath the sky, don't know why;
But sure as hell makes you wonder.

-G (breathe)

Dem Beautiful Girls

2007-08-04T21:08:00.000-07:00

Whatchu know 'bout me? Young squire.
You ain't nuthing' but a G. Thang. Fire.

In the hole, with so much soul...
Feelin' the flow and ready to go.

Where? Don't matter. Just fit you in the black hatter.
Got you suicidal witcho fallen idol, and dem girls...

-G-Press(on)

Where were you?

2007-06-01T22:55:00.000-07:00

Where were you when the planes hit the tower?
Counting each minute, hour after hour.

Where were you when JFK's death bell tolled?
Taking in the sun and view from the grassy knoll.

Where were you when we invaded Vietnam?
Still protesting the dropping of the Atom Bomb.

Where were you when the market crashed?
Speakin' easy with a cig dangling ash.

Where where you when independence was won?
Flying a kite out of site with no powder in my gun.

Where were you when push came to shove?
Soaring like an eagle on the wings of a dove.

-G-whiz

G-whiz baby pleez...

2007-06-01T21:05:00.000-07:00

Let me take you to an island with a sweet cool breeze. You don't feel like driving baby hand me the keys and we can mmmmmmmm, put your mind at ease.

Put my mind at what? Put my mind out where? Like I'm playing with you brother and your jerry curl hair. C'mon mon - it's the island we seek. Where the players play and the women are meek.

Sensatiable, insatiable, fellatiable, you know my game's no bull.

Try me, die me, wine me and dine me - kick me in the eye and I might try to fly me... to the moon. Benvenido, a Miami.

Like I care about my hair,
-G-curl

Give it up, stop...

2007-05-21T19:19:00.001-07:00

Make it hip, hop. Take him down, town. Where's the up, side? Is that a double, wide?

-That hit the G, spot.

I Set Out To Be Tha Lyrical G

2007-03-10T20:47:00.000-08:00

It was not a conscious decision, more circumstance than precision.

It came to me, dear as family, now I'm livin' tha life o' my volition.

-G-had

Was Tha Werd?

2007-03-10T20:42:00.000-08:00

Werd, werd, werd -- tha byrd is tha werd. Flyin' high thru the sky like an eagle so high.

Ya gotta get up to get down. Now dance for me, ya sad clown. Come on now, dance, dance. Revolution.

You say da, I say jah, mon. I wanna jam on witchu. Said the jammin' Jew. So whatcha gonna do? Was I talkin' to you? Nah, mon.

-G, mon-y

Precipitation precipitated the perks of perculation

2006-09-16T16:18:00.000-07:00

Jimmy crack corn and I don't care. Had a kernel with the Colonel with the mustard hair.

Looked him in the eye. Saw only that I... just didn't care.

Kinda makes you wonder. With all the stress that you're under. Where?

Never before seen and never again been... a has. A razz, a dazz. And all that jazz.

Lightly sweetened, lightly salted. Put the brakes on the breaks until we halted.

Stopped right there. Still without a care. Paid the man a fare and began the affair.

It felt good and it felt nice. Like chicken soup with rice served over ice.

I had a ball, told the bitch I'd call. Then out came the fall as I hit the wall.

Still not a feeling I could understand. Why didn't I care that I was half the man?

I used to be... gleefully and full of glee. Just couldn't see...

The dogg from the dogged. The water from the logged. The hogger from the hogged.

The bishop seized the night. Knowing he was right. Gave the queen a fright. Before moving out of sight.

Keep it in check, mate. Don't darely tempt fate. Can't hardly wait to lift the weight off my plate.

So take a load off. Put it on me. That's me caring... hardily.

Closing time is here. And though the feeling's near. I nearly saw clearly the path to the clear.

When I get there, I fear, I'll fare-well enough to care. Until then I'll keep an ear to the air.

That was corny,
Cobble-G

Crikey

2006-07-28T17:26:00.000-07:00

By and by, the minutes fly. Compounded by daze. Exponentially phrased. Rather, frayed. Split end to the right. Got you in my sight. Makes me wonder what's down under. Looking, searching, coming up for air. Do I dare? Derriere? Shake it, shake it. The sugar's free. On the reef or wharf - rats. Cats. Meow. The apple of my brow. Pasteurized. Just past your eyes. There. To the left. No, my left. Cleft. Lip. Slip. Drrrrrop. Don't stop. Funky hip hop. Rise to the top. Carrot. Share it. Sell it to the butcher in the store. Ya whore. Ravage. Cabbage. Smells like... teen spirit? Cheer or jeer it. Just steer it. Away. From here. Everclear. Lemon. Drrrrrrrrrrrop. Isn't she gorgeous? Later.

-Ali-G-Ator

wang bang doodle

2006-07-09T00:37:00.000-07:00

all night long - sing me a song - piano man. biddy biddy bop - woo hoo - choo choo. come on and ride it - slip slide it - away. from here - where the only thing that's clear, is the arbor mist - god, how i miss - her.

-Never Endin-G

Will It Ever Stop?

2006-07-03T14:04:00.000-07:00

Yo - I don't be knowin-G

Random 5

2006-07-03T14:03:00.000-07:00

If at first you don’t succeed, try the other pen. And if, at last, all else fails, breathe and count to ten.

-G-unit of measure

Random 4

2006-07-03T14:02:00.000-07:00

Come around here, don’t you no more. Quick jab. Pun jab. Another slab on the side. Let it ride. Sally.

-Spiderin-G

Random 3

2006-07-03T14:01:00.000-07:00

Spoken word? Seems oxy-moronic. Soul refreshing? Barely colonic. Poetic? Prophetic? Pathetic? Surely Shirley. Just don’t call me.

-Do-Re-Me-Fa-So-La-Ti-G

Random 2

2006-07-03T14:00:00.000-07:00

A turn for the stranger, this blog has taken. A place for rearranging and not mistaking - the noun for the verb or the grass for the herb. The free associating, lyric-concatenating, thought-stringing-togethering, mind-altering, reflectering, mirror into my married mind. For all to see.

-Yo-Yo-Da-in-G

Random

2006-07-03T13:58:00.000-07:00

Fly me to the moon. Moon me on the bus. Drive me home. Tonight. Tonight. Feelin’ alright. Feelin’ almight-y. I just might see. Light-ly. Down the tunnel. Along the tracks. Squinting. Could it be? Yes. Home Sweet Home. Alabama.

-Peacin-G out

Fried

2006-06-10T13:20:00.000-07:00

Words swirl about but no thoughts stand out. How do I make sense of this present tense? I’M LOCKED UP LIKE CAPS. No compass or maps. North gives way to South and East meets West. As the dirt off my shoulder falls squarely on my chest. Busted. Flat. Ten-pinned to the mat. Mind in the gutter. Can’t barely utter. A. Single. Word. Much less string a few together. In a haze like the weather. Outside. Looking in. Is that a Sin? Then battle me, prod-cattle me. Cause I ain’t horsing around. No more. Ed. Note. That’s what I wrote. And I shall reap what I sow. So? What? Exactly.

-RAMSCLINB-G

Transitory Perceptions

2006-01-22T13:19:00.000-08:00

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
No need to paint the post
Or name an avenue after me.

I will know that you are there
In the vicinity of the sky.
The light that cuts through the darkness
Directs me towards your eyes.

Shift your gaze from the ground below
To the clouds, the birds, the trees...
And whenever you feel like reminiscing
Head up to the balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
It may seem like an odd request-
What else would you expect from me?

The street curb will protect me
With the shelter of a cave.
No need to wallow in cemetery slums
To visit my old grave.

The distance that's between us
May seem vast as the sea...
Rely on your death perception
To stay sharp on the balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
I'll take on a different form
When you lay the sheet over me.

Beware the shadow that I cast
If you believe in ghosts.
But keep in mind that I'm right there-
Lying beneath the post.

And if you want to escape
Of feel the need to flee...
Grab a book, a friend, a tune
And relax on the balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
You'll gain strength and stability
Each night because of me.

Until the lightning strikes the clocktower-
Like Big Ben, I'll tick.
And soon a pattern will emerge
And the time you will predict.

Find some space in your routine
To rewrite history...
Past, present, and future will collide
With a bang on the balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
Bright as any star in the sky-
For reference locate me.

Perhaps a power failure
Will leave you with noone to trust.
Perhaps the rain will endlessly fall-
Leaving my pole to rust.

Believe that my soul will light
The path to our destiny...
Follow the blue square down the road
But grip the railing of the balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
When you catch a beautiful sunset,
Stop and think of me.

The jagged rays are trails
That extend from my light;
They divide the sky into planes
As day melts into night.

Use the calendar as your guide
And on the anniversary...
Break out the compass and some fine wine
And soak it in on the balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
There'll be nights my light is dim
Making it hard to spot me.

The bulb that once glowed strong
With eerie incandescence,
Becomes clouded by a gathering
Attracted to my presence.

The dark circle swarms around
Keeping me company...
Watch the living comfort the dead
From your seat on the balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
If you feel safer close to the ground,
Crawl slowly towards me.

The light will always be there
When you close your lids.
The daydream ends when you open your eyes-
We were only kids.

Laugh out loud at the hand you're dealt,
Then fold pitifully...
For when the stakes get too high,
You can retreat to the balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
Please don't think harshly
When legs or tires cross me.

From above it may appear
To be their respect that lacks.
Alas, my tombstone's just a crack
That'll break their Mamma's backs.

It's not beneath the ground
That my soul shines endlessly...
But above the fray and lighting the way
Visibly from the balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
I'll do my best to keep the beat
When you sing down to me.

Each note will resonate
From my head to my toes,
And it will flow through the earth
To the top of my pole.

Together we'll make sweet music
And birds will hum the melody...
The people on the street will demand
An encore from the balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
When you tap into my mindset,
You'll want to fly with me.

As you lay me down to rest,
Take a snapshot of the sky.
Each time you see similar hues,
You'll achieve a natural high.

Travel to far-off distant lands
And immerse yourself in the scenery...
But to truly recapture the panorama,
Rent a room with a balcony.

Bury me under a streetpole
And visit me from the balcony.
If, by chance, my bulb burns out,
Don't lose sight of me.

Take a deep breath and close your eyes.
The blue square will remain,
And no matter where you look,
It will numb all your pain.

To hang on to that fleeting glimpse,
Stare into the light and see...
And when your eyes shut once again,
Know I'm there under the balcony.

Ol'-G

The Search

2005-12-08T15:00:00.000-08:00

Seek and ye shall find...
Whatever's on your mind.

If it's out there to be seen,
Or somehwere in between...

Then it surely shall be found,
Inch by inch, pound for pound.

-G-oogle

Got my mind on the music...

2005-02-08T20:36:00.000-08:00

The music of my mind ebbs and flows,
Where it starts and stops, nobody knows.

There is one thing, though, that I know for sure,
The music of my mind is, oh, so pure.

Like cherry kool-aid straight from the bottle;
Like all 6 V's humming at full throttle.

Moving through my body... each cell, each vein, each pore;
The music of my mind leaves me achy and sore.

Yet, at the same time, yearning for more.

The music of my mind is the echo of my soul.
It tears me into pieces but always makes me whole.

Can you hear it?
-Listen Careful-G

Where ya been Dogg?

2005-01-19T18:59:00.000-08:00

-finding inspiration

Houdini

2005-01-19T18:56:00.000-08:00

An impossible mission? An unrealistic feat?
Nah, just an ambitious goal currently incomplete.

What began as a promise to revolutionize,

Has gone nearly half a year without any reprise.

A disappearance on par with Bin-Laden;
Leaving ye ole faithful hella-downtrodden.

Alas, even the best laid plans of mice and doggs,
Can vanish into the online abyss of blogs.

So join me as I attempt to resurrect my Werd,
And fully transform myself into a cyber-nerd.

Arriveder-G

Bloggin'

2004-08-02T07:31:00.000-07:00

Oh yeah, well alright, I'm bloggin'... I wanna blog it with you!

I'm bloggin'... bloggin', bloggin'... and I hope you like bloggin' too!

Jah mon,
Rastafar-G